I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
I was carrying him baywatch style into my place because he passed out.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
sober me doesnt really want him anymore, but when drunk me takes over, she might want him, and god only knows the shit that might happen with drunk me.
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
Randomize
