sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Randomize
