yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
My phone auto-corrects smirnoff to poisoned. I think it is trying to tell me something.
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
Have you ever given your heart and soul to someone and they turn out to be nothing but a great fuck that makes a mean grilled cheese because same
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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