Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
also, you're talking to the girl for whom "deformed baby arm" wasn't quite a dealbreaker.
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
Do you remember calling yourself Captain Cockblock and openly giving out everyones sexual history? Because you did.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
