Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
I woke up to you singing What Makes You Beautiful and trying to blend an avocado with vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a really great story behind the missing Coco Puffs and vodka mystery
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
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