I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He doesn't deserve you. Your ass looks 8 times better than his face ever will. Wanna order pizza and watch porn?
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
Got so drunk last night I kinda sent a super on point sext to his kid sister...say a prayer man
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
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