You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
well someone pooped in the lint basket in the laundry room last night, but none of us will admit to it so we're all just secretly judging each other and doubting ourselves.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
You squatted and peed on the living room floor while maintaining eye contact with Sebastian
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
