READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
