it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
I kept telling myself all night that it was completely okay for me to lose all sense of my morals because it was my birthday.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
She caught me by google maps... Lets just say it wasnt her car in front of the house.
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
Randomize
