Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Hiding the dark circles under my eyes this morning was like trying to hide a Beached Whale on the Couch eating Pita chips.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
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