people and things i regret. that's what i want to do tonight.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Im about to have a threesome, Ill pay you twenty bucks to go clean my room. Just throw it all in the closet.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
I'm not going to pass up the opportunity to be half naked and covered in glitter without facing judgement or legal prosecution. I'll be there.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
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