You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
She started puking and I started running and I swear to god there was a wave of vomit chasing me down the stairs.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
One step ahead. Always. Roses are red, violets are blue... I'm gonna fuck you with a rake.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I really want to stop getting this drunk. I've got the Sunday scaries and it's only Saturday
Randomize
