I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You are NEVER going to guess whose penis was JUST in my mouth!!!
I'll give you a hint, we ate paste with him in kindergarten.
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
I think I pulled a boob muscle during phone sex
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
I don't want them thinking I'm like, "Mm, yeah, kitchenware in my ass please."
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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