She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
We found him in the neighbors shed using a bicycle as a blanket. We just left him there.
I most definitely just found a video on my phone that I accidentally took... You can't see anything and all you can hear is me talking about how good your water was... And then I fed it to you... And used the word "eloquent" to describe it.
you smell like cheap hookers & chicken nuggets.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
you made out with another girl for some wings
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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