Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
Tampa is so boring. I'm dying. I want lots of cleavage at my funeral. If i cant get laid, i want my friends to. I'm that kind of person
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I would professionally fuck the shit out of her
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
dont you DARE use my tequila influenced words against me
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
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