I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
The 19 Strangest Things People Use To Get Off
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
My cab driver just started a conversation with "Three years ago I pleaded guilty..." Check on me later tonight please.
Such a good question, let's ask the alcohol gods for the answer.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
These 25 Normal Couples Tried Porn Moves During Sex And It Ended Horribly
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.