It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I hope you get eaten by satanic starfish.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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