What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
Randomize
