I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
She STILL went home with me even when I said yes when she asked if I had an infectious disease. Turns out she asked if I had an infectious spirit...well she has my infectious spirit now
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
New one-upper goal: I have to shit off the side of a moving train then jump off
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
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