I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
The guy got mobbed on, all hell broke loose. About 20 cops showed up, and this kid somehow convinced a cop that letting him pee in front of him is justifiable. This guy could sweet talk Hellen Keller, he was THAT good
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
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