I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
so... the fat chick just walked over, shook my hand, then introduced herself as "versatile". shoot me now.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Things I just found under my covers: protein bar, string cheese, vibrator.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
Randomize