But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Why would vodka do this to me? I've always been loyal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I'm worried my skin won't stretch enough to handle this boner. Then what?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
You pretended to be Borat in that weird slingshot bathing suit and then proceeded to send another dick pic/nude selfie and said you weren't naked because you were wearing a hat.
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
Randomize