the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
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