we made out on top of his cat.
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
She was knocking on the tree demanding to be let in
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
Talking to him sober hurts my brain
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
At some point i am going to say to you "i have this really bad idea! You in? " just go with it.
Randomize
