Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Randomize