i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
Randomize
