For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
did you know the cops in wilco have clean up kits in their cars for when people puke in them? i found this out this morning. i'm finishing paperwork now. come get me plz?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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