I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
I am too young to be this hungover
Is this your way of saying you want a sober 19th?
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Denial and avoidance are my survival strategies for 2013.
Denial, avoidance and beer.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
me + whiskey = a bad person
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
Business idea: assless chaps for toddlers. I'm high.
Randomize
