It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
Your penis caused this!
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
