Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
and she was petting her beer can
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
He just sent me a picture of me icing a cake with a butcher knife topless.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
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