His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep in the tanning bed, naked, for an hour and a half and I guess they couldn't wake me up so they called the fire department...and they came in while I was passed out naked...
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
i got woken up by a cockroach crawling onto my hand and now i'm pretty sure i'll never be clean again
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
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