After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
I wish I only lived at night.
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
I was in a house full of lesbians and they were all staring at me. I felt like the last cresent roll on Thanksgiving.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
URGENT INPUT I'm at a renesance fair after party and I'm 100% lined up to fuck their sword swallower OR their contortionist. Dont say both - which direction doth I roll?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What part of don't open in front of your kids didn't you understand? Astroglide, magnums, fuzzy handcuffs and a blindfold are going to be hard to explain as friends presents.
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I really don’t want to have kids.
I thought we agreed we were done with dirty talk for the day
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
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