break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
so ur a construction worker, male escort, sex god and surfer? lol
well its been awhile since I've surfed
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Protip if he licks the back of your knee and you reflexively kick him your game of 'lick the lady' is over.
Randomize