Define "chronic" masturbator.
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
theres too many punctuation errors in that text to turn me on.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
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