Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
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