What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
I have to finish a biography for history and write a review on it so naturally I was like "getting high will make this more bearable" and now I'm basically inside the book at the revolutionary war with this guy.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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