like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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