Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
Confirm your location. A cross street is best, but if google mapping yourself is your least-shameful option go for it. ps- going through his mail for an actual address is always an option.
it was like eating out sand paper
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
it's like i need an invisible sign across my boobs that says "DOESN'T HAVE DADDY ISSUES" that only old men can see
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
I asked if I could borrow some condoms. She referred to herself as "a soup kitchen for whores".
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
I HAVE TOO MICH DICK TALKING TO ME IDK WHAT TO DO.
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
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