Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Question #1: Why am I on my living room floor? Question #2: Where did the bloody footprints come from? Question #3: Why are there two McChickens next to the wine bottle?
Dude, you GARGLED with bleu cheese last night!
If you fuck up my birthday by dying I will kick your fucking corpse.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
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