how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
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