I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
If i see another girl turn you down you should either turn gay or just kill yourself
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
well you don't shave your pubes into a handlebar mustache and keep the party to yourself
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Randomize
