don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
He took my necklace off while we were 69ing. His tongue never stopped moving either. Take that, guys who can't figure out how bras work.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My sister just poured me a dbl Ciroc on the rocks and said "the ice makes it festive." Honestly what a role model.
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
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