I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
Maybe if I ever do become a counselor, I would just implement a kind of intensive meme therapy.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
