Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
so do you, all the weight can't fall on me. I'll befriend a ball pit owner if you will befriend a drug dealer. teamwork.
He was all like, "I think ur the one that got away and I miss you." I replied, "I gave u a hand job once in your hot tub. No need to wax nostalgic about it."
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Three months into our sexual relationship, he comes out with "Your body is efficient". WTF do I do with THAT?
Holy shit, add "successfully got stoned secretly at a party where a cop was" to my list of accomplishments.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
Randomize
