would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Met my future wife peeing in the men's room. I stood in for the missing door on the stall. We really hit it off talking about how her butt didn't even touch the seat from all the years of squat lifting in high school.
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
We have so much sex to catch up on
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
We need some Captain and Fanta. That shit will change your life. Sidenote, bring an IV drip to hook me to in the morning
He just said "I can't wait to penetrate you tomorrow" I sat in silence for a second...he attempted to save it by saying "I can't wait to enter you".
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
What? No, wine isn't my weakness, I just love it.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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