Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
I didn't want sex last night, but she charmed my dick out of my pants like a snake charmer.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
Not my fault the fence refused to just break when I ran into it.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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