The only reason I kept his number in my phone for so long is so that hed pay for my abortion.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
all I know is he gave me a Cialis and tried to take me home.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
Turns out the grown up version of seeing your teacher shopping is seeing your therapist is on tinder
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