I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Babe.. You are farting in your sleep and it literally smells like something crawled up your asshole and died.. I'm gagging and I feel like I'm eating your fart right now. I want to tape your ass cheeks shut and plug up that canon you call your ass. All I hear is snores and farts.. You are lucky I love you
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
It's six am and her daughter just walked in on her mom and roomful of naked people playing strip spoons. glad Im apart of that childhood memory....
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
Randomize
