He just asked me to come into his empty apartment after he called his parents to make sure they wouldn't come home while I was there. This is starting to look like a bad rape scene from one of those made-for-TV Lifetime movies.
My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
As shirtless as possible
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Just told my mom life fisted my asshole. She looked at me with complete understanding. I'm scared...
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
