yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
so explain to me why i woke up in jail this morning
because you opened a jar or pickles and a bag of fritos and layed down in the middle of aisle 7 while singing 'la cucaracha'
no more ever clear
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Sitting in the car eating a bagel. Watching a guy do tai chi in the parking lot. My morning is fabulous
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